How many resolutions have you set and forgotten about within a couple months? I know, I’ve done it too. I’ve felt really ambitious and then lost every bit of momentum I had. But the truth is, goals don’t achieve themselves. They don’t work if you “set ’em and forget ’em.” What if you tried something different this year? What if you set resolutions you’ll actually keep???
The first week of the year, several things tend to happen:
The gym is packed.
Motivational posts on social media are at a high.
Lives are organized.
Excitement is in the air.
Then certain words start to trend:
And that’s totally fine. Sometimes we need to define what we’re doing, in order to start working toward something.
But most people miss a simple fact: 94% of people don’t keep their New Year Resolutions.
Because once January is over, most goals lose their novelty. We settle back into old ways and the newness doesn’t seem so exciting anymore.
We feel defeated. We feel like failures. And we tell ourselves the same stories over and over, for the rest of the year…
“I’ll start Monday.”
“I can’t do this without my friend/spouse’s support.”
“I’ll wait for X, Y, Z and then I’ll try again.”
But it doesn’t happen.
It’s a self-sabotaging cycle that most of us have gotten stuck in at one point or another.
So instead of beating yourself up if and when you make a mistake, figuring out what you really want this year and setting goals that you’ll actually keep are the keys to helping you make it happen…
Resolutions You’ll Actually Keep:
The first thing to ask yourself is “what am I trying to accomplish here?”
Think about the goals you’re setting for the week, month, year.
Now, what will your life look like when you achieve them?
If you’re goal is to lose weight, how will you feel when those 10lbs are gone? What will the weight loss do for your mindset? How will you treat yourself in your new body? Those are the questions to ask yourself when setting the “physical” goals like weight loss and working out. When you know what you really want, the next step is to get into that mindset and treat yourself “as if.”
Start before you’re ready. Think and act “as if!”
Waiting until you lose 10lbs to treat yourself with love only keeps you from making progress! Love yourself now. Love yourself for who you are and the work you’re going to do. Get into the mindset and think the thoughts that you would if you were already “there.” The positive choices and long term change will follow naturally.
Now that you have an idea of things to ask yourself, you have a good foundation for setting your 2017 goals.
To help you keep going, here’s several goals centered around the basics, the feelings and the things that help simplify our lives: Resolutions you’ll actually keep this year!
Spend more (quality!) time with family.
Some of your family members probably live in your house, so you might as well. How often are you all in the same room watching tv or playing on your phones? (I’m totally guilty of this!) Make a plan to have a weekly game night or not allow phones at the table. Actually talk to each other. If you spend hours together but aren’t actually connecting, it doesn’t strengthen the relationships. Value that quality time together.
Nope. I’m not talking about writing down every single things you’re going to eat for the week and preparing everything a head of time. Unless that kind of structure is what works for you. I’m talking about planning to eat some meals! Keep it simple – Make a list of your/your family’s favorite meals and add one new thing a week or every other week. (Hint: we eat about the same 20 things each week, so you’re really just filling in some blanks!)
I promise you, my meal planning isn’t anything crazy. I chat with my husband about what we want to make during the week, anything special we want to try and I write a grocery list around the ideas. I make sure to have healthy snacks in the pantry and some frozen stuff in the freezer. I don’t designate nights of the week for certain things, but I absolutely have an idea of what I’ll be cooking throughout the week and make sure all the groceries I’ll need are in the house.
Move your body.
If I had a dollar for every time people asked me for help because they “want to lose weight but hate working out” I’d have a lot of dollars! Don’t make working out something you dread. First of all, be grateful you have working arms and legs and are capable of working out. Because I’m sure there are a lot of people who would love to be in your position. Start there. With expressing extreme amounts of gratitude for your body. Then think about what type of physical activities you enjoy.
If working out isn’t something you’re excited about, you have to set a resolution you’ll actually keep! Like going for walks after dinner, waking up a few minutes early to stretch or taking that dance class. Interested in boxing but you’ve never tried it? Go take a free trial class! Try new stuff until you find things you like! (Hint: a high intensity workout like boxing is amazing for your body, mindset, confidence and burns a crazy amount of calories!)
Think good thoughts.
Pay attention what you’re thinking. Commit 24 hours to figuring it out: set a time for every hour and write down what you’re thinking, feeling and anything significant. This will help you identify patterns of negativity or how you feel when you’re in certain environments. You’ll be able to notice real quick if you’ve been stuffing negative feelings each time you see that certain person or when so-and-so pops up on your Facebook feed!
Once you’re aware of what you’re thinking, you can start to observe how you feel. Our feelings drive our thoughts, and our thoughts drive our behaviors. So the quicker you can recognize how you’re truly feeling, the sooner you’ll be able to shift your thoughts and become more productive, make better decisions and do things that make you feel good!
I’m a fan of specific goals, and knowing exactly what you want. It’s something I help each of my clients do pretty much right off the bat… but if there’s no substance (aka FEELING) behind them, they don’t last. And then, any results are likely to be temporary.
So if you’re looking to set resolutions for 2017, do it! But don’t just set them to set them. Put some effort into it. Figure out what you’re really trying to accomplish. Figure out what you really want. Then you’ll be able to figure out what and who you need that will help you get there.
It’s not about setting resolutions.
It’s about setting resolutions you’ll actually keep!